Do you know children/teens/young adults who act like they must be happy all the time? Dr. Kathy unpacks this technology lie in today’s video. She’ll help you understand how their behavior is related to this belief and what to do about it. For example, we can help them process well the negative feelings they want to avoid.

To learn more about Dr. Kathy’s book “Screens and Teens: Connecting with our kids in a wireless world” and the wide selection of resources provided by Celebrate Kids, please visit shop.celebratekids.com

Diana Waring Interviews “Number Smart”

Let’s continue our series of posts using Diana Waring’s videos about the 8 Great Smarts with another video. She and I are both glad you’ve landed here.

You may or may not be aware that the “father” of multiple intelligences is Dr. Howard Gardner, a brilliant man affiliated with Harvard University. He titled the smart Diana interviews on this video “logical-mathematical intelligence.”

A colleague of his who I greatly respect, Dr. Thomas Armstrong, took Dr. Gardner’s work and made it more accessible. One way he did this was to simplify Dr. Gardner’s terms. For a while this intelligence was referred to by some people  as “number smart.” Dr. Armstrong chose “logic smart” as a better summary term and it’s what I use in my book, teachings, and other blogs. You’ll hear Diana refer to this smart as “number smart.” And, you’ll hear her talk about how the smart includes skills and interests with numbers and with logic. If you’re a longtime follower of mine, don’t let this confuse you. She’s talking about the same smart I am.

Did your children learn their numbers before their letters? Did you notice them spontaneously counting things without being directed to do so? Do you remember your children asking questions at a young age and then continuing in that habit? How many of them wanted to understand how things work? Did they ever take anything apart to discover how it worked? These are all evidences of children being logic smart.

Constant questioning from logic-smart children can be annoying and exhausting when children are young. Preteens and teens with logic smart strengths who are not self-controlled can tend toward argumentative behavior. They can be a handful. They may keep asking why they’re not allowed to do something or why they have to do what you asked them to do. They may always want or need a rationale for your decision. You may have noticed one of their strengths is providing one for you as they logically try to convince you they’re right. It can be exhausting.

Yet, thinking in these ways is a strength based on a smart they must learn to use for good and not to do harm. Diana, as always, talks well about this. please listen. And, grab your kids to listen, too, so she can encourage them.

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Have you missed the smarts we’ve already covered? You can watch Diana’s videos here. And, you can read more about Diana and her curricula using the smarts at www.dianawaring.com.

Diana’s Biographical Sketch

Diana Waring is one of the pioneers of homeschooling. For nearly three decades she has been an author and speaker to the international homeschool movement. Diana is the author and publisher of the History Revealed curriculum, the Experience History Through Music series (William T. Anderson authored one of the titles in this series), Beyond Survival, Reaping the Harvest, and numerous world history and homeschool encouragement audio CDs. She is a video blogger, blogger, columnist for The Homeschool Minute, guest writer at The Old Schoolhouse magazine, curriculum writer, singer/composer, actress/playwright, wife, and homeschool mom. To learn more, please visit www.DianaWaring.com

Love Well Today & Tomorrow (A Love List)

In today’s world, it would seem in many instances that love is confused with personal desires or goals, or minimized to a single expression of it through romantic emotion. The temptation is to see “love” through a selfish lens or as a means to an end. This list of what I believe are the manifestations of love poured out of my mind and heart for today. Love is certain things, but love also does certain things as well. Check out the list, and as always, I hope you find it to be a blessing.

Love well today.

Listen to understand.

Be enthusiastic.

Be fair.

Show initiative.

Endure.

Be careful.

Share hope.

Choose to try to understand someone’s circumstances.

Use appropriate boundaries.

Be vulnerable.

Be compassionate.

Be other-centered.

Assume there may be things going on that we don’t know about.

Be quiet.

Don’t gossip.

Serve.

Stop the sarcasm.

Lead and follow.

Nurture.

Persevere.

Restore.

Be sensitive.

Be thoughtful.

Accept.

Have vision.

Stop judging.

Be kind.

Be available.

Have integrity.

Seek joy in your relationships.

Be strong.

Talk about Jesus’ love.

Be optimistic.

Ask better questions.

Talk less about yourself.

Don’t let anger last.

Be faithful.

Follow up.

Pray.

Be alert.

Listen longer.

Grow.

Be cheerful.

Discern.

Be full of grace.

Speak truth in love.

Express gratitude.

Be courageous.

Look for progress, not perfection.

Be teachable.

Don’t bully.

Be gentle.

Choose beauty.

Share hope.

Be at peace.

Be humble.

Be bold.

Forgive.

Sing together.

Slow down.

Make eye contact.

Believe.

Listen carefully.

Create together.

Don’t assume.

Pay attention.

Uphold what is true, right, and just.

Be transparent.

Look.

Be purposeful.

Connect.

Do not be jealous.

Be good.

Care with action.

Rest together.

Dare to be different.

Stop comparing.

Be confident.

Trust.

Put your phone down.

Don’t be afraid.

Learn.

Be self-controlled.

Touch.

Regret what you should.

Go deeper.

Give wise counsel when you’ve earned the right.

Encourage.

Be honest.

Choose better.

Stop whining.

Be helpful.

Prioritize people.

Don’t hate.

Speak up.

Be positive.

Have fair expectations.

Don’t treat people as projects.

Share.

Be generous.

Be passionate.

Choose to forget what you should.

Choose to remember what you should.

Don’t fear.

Be authentic.

Be flexible.

Be grateful.

Honor.

Mourn with those who mourn.

Rejoice with those who rejoice.

Grieve together.

Celebrate together.

Do not envy.

Love unconditionally.

Sacrifice.

Be spontaneous.

Be patient.

Treat people as unique individuals.

Seek good.

Empower others.

Look up.

Lift people up.

Be resilient.

Understand.

Be fully present.

Love well tomorrow.

In this video, Dr. Kathy explains that many young people believe they are the center of their own universe. After briefly explaining why they think this, she shares practical, realistic things you can do to combat the lie and lead them to truth. Even inviting someone over for dinner can help. Listen and you’ll discover why.

To learn more about Dr. Kathy’s book “Screens and Teens: Connecting with our kids in a wireless world” and the wide selection of resources provided by Celebrate Kids, please visit shop.celebratekids.com

Diana Waring Interviews “Picture Smart”

When you were a child, when did you feel smart? Think about that for a minute.

One of the reasons I love teaching about multiple intelligences and a main reason I wrote the book, 8 Great Smarts, is because there are far too many children who struggle in school and believe they are not smart. Also, they have great strengths but don’t think that means they’re smart. Depending upon your background you may believe the lie that you are not smart.

For instance, I imagine that people who remember coloring well and enjoying it when they were young didn’t necessarily feel smart because of it. Did you enjoy dot-to-dot books or mazes as a child? That’s because you’re picture smart. Was art one of your favorite classes? This is because you are picture smart. Did you enjoy and do well with maps, diagrams, and designs? Were your favorite assignments ones that involved drawing or creating? Are you creative today with color and design? You are picture smart. This smart could show up with the outfits you wear, or how you decorate your home, the way you display things on your desk, and even the way you plant flowers with a particular attention to the colors. There are so many ways to demonstrate you’re picture smart!

  • You’re not just creative – you’re smart!
  • You’re not just talented – you’re smart!
  • You’re not just good with colors – you’re smart!

At a speaking event yesterday I met a 63-year-old professional artist. She creates and sells beautiful oil paintings. I grieved with her when she told me that some people still ask her when she’s going to get a real job. This is probably the perspective of people who have the smarts most validated by the school system. They’re wrong and it’s sad and it’s among the reasons I’m glad you are here reading this blog.

Here you can watch Diana Waring’s video about being picture smart. Enjoy it. Choose to believe her. And then gather some children to watch it with you so you can talk about it. If you know any adults like my new 63-year-old friend please forward this to them with an encouragement from you. tell them you know they’re smart!

Diana’s Biographical Sketch

Diana Waring is one of the pioneers of homeschooling. For nearly three decades she has been an author and speaker to the international homeschool movement. Diana is the author and publisher of the History Revealed curriculum, the Experience History Through Music series (William T. Anderson authored one of the titles in this series), Beyond Survival, Reaping the Harvest, and numerous world history and homeschool encouragement audio CDs. She is a video blogger, blogger, columnist for The Homeschool Minute, guest writer at The Old Schoolhouse magazine, curriculum writer, singer/composer, actress/playwright, wife, and homeschool mom. To learn more, please visit www.DianaWaring.com

Inspire Academic Improvement By Resisting The “Perfection Infection”

It happens often. I bet you do it. I totally understand and yet I hope my insights encourage you to stop. Curious? Keep reading.

When you empty your children’s backpacks or go through their school folders looking at their daily work and returned tests, do you ask, “How did the other kids do?”

As soon as we ask, we’ve decreased our children’s security. Suddenly they feel as if ita’s not really about doing their best, even if that’s what we said as they headed to school. No, in reality, it appears we care about how they stand in comparison to their peers. But is that wise? Necessary?

For example, your son may have earned a 92% and been thrilled because the test was challenging. When you ask, “How did the other kids do?” you imply the 92% is only good if it’s a better score than most of his peers earned.

Your daughter may have earned a low score and she’s already feeling badly about it. She’s not looking forward to you finding out and now you’ve put additional pressure on her. Now she may feel the score is even worse because it’s among the lowest in her class. Having to admit this to us may not motivate her to do better next time.

Constantly comparing our kids to others causes our encouragement to “do your best” and “concentrate on yourself; don’t worry about others.” to fall on deaf ears. They’ll stop believing us. They may get angry. These comparisons violate the key identity that they’re unique miracles. Comparing them can negatively affect peer relationships.

Comparing our kids is also one of the things that causes them to think we’re never satisfied and we expect them to be perfect. Jill Savage and I wrote, in No More Perfect Kids: “The more we compare, the higher our expectations climb. There it is: the Perfection Infection.” (p. 37) and “If they compare, or if they hear us comparing, they may feel inadequate and without realizing it, the Perfection Infection can raise its ugly head.” (p. 184) Among other negatives, perfectionism can paralyze our kids and make it less likely they’ll take risks and aim high.

Asking our children how they did is often appropriate. We may not always have to ask. Sometimes wait to see if they bring it up when they want to. We must ask about more than their scores and grades. If we don’t, they’ll think that’s all we care about. This can cause them to put their security in their grades and performances. This is never a good idea. For suggested questions to ask that are often much more important than “How did you do?” check out this relevant video.

When we do ask about their grades, rather than asking how other kids did, we can often follow up with one or both of these questions:

  • How satisfied are you with that grade?
  • Is there anything you’ll do differently when studying and preparing for a similar assignment/test?

Now we can follow up appropriately. If they’re satisfied with a grade lower than we would have preferred, let’s look for teachable moments to discuss why we think they’re capable of more. (But, be careful that they don’t assume perfection is what we want.) The same thing is true if they’re hard on themselves when their grades were excellent and they’re disappointed because they weren’t perfect. We might be able to talk about it immediately. Or, look for an opportunity to bring it up later. If they’re satisfied and so are we, let them know! This will increase their security in themselves and in us.

If our children claim they want to study differently and prepare differently, we can remind them and help them as best we can.

Conversations after school about school are something to take seriously. I trust these ideas will help you successfully get your children to share with you. I know you want to know how things are going. Good for you!

Diana Waring Interviews “Nature Smart”

Interests and abilities. They’re both valid when thinking about multiple intelligences. The ways we and our children are smart show up first as interests. Then, when these interests are responded to, abilities may follow. They may not. Or low ability may follow, but not high. It depends on God’s choice when creating us. right?

I have relatively high interest in some elements of nature, but not all. And, my abilities across the board aren’t strong. This is one of my less developed intelligences. What about you?

I’ve been on safari in Africa and here in the States, including at the fabulous Fossil Rim Wildlife Center near where I live. I go to our fabulous Fort Worth zoo often. I enjoy observing the animals. I don’t need to understand why they do what they do. I don’t need to remember which deer is which.

I appreciate brightly colored flowers and especially in beautiful arrangements. This is because my parents gardened well and my mom had a real talent for arranging flowers in vases. There’s an emotional interest here, but no personal ability.

When my brother and I were young, we caught a garden snake and built a cage to keep it for a while. I paid attention to it, but looking back it was more my logic smart that engaged me than being nature smart. I wanted to know how it lived in the burlap covering of our garden’s rose bush. How long had it been there? How did it survive in the winter? What did it eat? Were there other snakes under other burlap coverings that we didn’t notice when it warmed up and our dad took the burlap off? As I often write – smarts never work alone. They always partner for effectiveness.

You’ll enjoy this week’s video about being nature smart by my friend, Diana Waring. Listen to how she describes the strengths a nature-smart person has. What careers might interest them? Listen to what she believes makes someone great and not just good. I agree with her. Watch this with your kids, too, because it will give you much to talk about.

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Have you missed the smarts we’ve already covered? You can watch Diana’s videos here. And, you can read more about Diana and her curricula using the smarts at www.dianawaring.com.

Diana’s Biographical Sketch

Diana Waring is one of the pioneers of homeschooling. For nearly three decades she has been an author and speaker to the international homeschool movement. Diana is the author and publisher of the History Revealed curriculum, the Experience History Through Music series (William T. Anderson authored one of the titles in this series), Beyond Survival, Reaping the Harvest, and numerous world history and homeschool encouragement audio CDs. She is a video blogger, blogger, columnist for The Homeschool Minute, guest writer at The Old Schoolhouse magazine, curriculum writer, singer/composer, actress/playwright, wife, and homeschool mom. To learn more, please visit www.DianaWaring.com

In this Valentine’s Day video, Dr. Kathy shares a special tradition she has with her two nieces and her nephew. Maybe this is your year to start a new tradition – they make holidays richer. She then wisely cautions us on our use of social media surrounding our gifts and how we’re celebrated. And for anyone for whom the day is hard, her last bit of advice is especially for you.

Content, Grateful, Loved, And Single

When I was a young adult, my brother and his wife called me into their bedroom during a family gathering. They had never done this before, so I knew something was up.

Both Dave and Debbie spoke, but my brother took the lead. They just wanted me to know that if I remained single, they would always be my family. They’d remember my birthday and invite me for all holidays. If I needed something, they’d do everything possible to help.

Until they loved me with these statements, I didn’t know how badly I needed to hear them.

Our parents were still alive and in good health. I still had my old bedroom to stay in when visiting for holidays. But, Dave and Deb were correct – there would be a time when our parents wouldn’t be alive.

Debbie and Dave opened their home to several single women who needed a place to stay for various reasons. Getting to know them and their concerns prompted their declaration to me. They came to appreciate the very real issue for many singles – where will I go when my parents die and will anyone remember me on my birthday?

I’m grateful to God for how comfortable I am being single. I don’t take it lightly. I know many single adults who would prefer to be married and some who are angry at God that they aren’t. I’ve met parents whose greatest concern seems to be whether their children will get married. In those cases, I’m happy to model contentment and fulfillment as a single.

In addition to Dave and Deb’s welcoming statement, what has contributed to my contentment?

  • Jesus was single. If there was anything wrong with this choice, God’s only Son would have been married. Jesus understands my temptations, fears, anxieties, confusion, lack of support, etc. If the single life was good enough for God’s only child, it must be good enough for me!
  • Marriage is not a cure for loneliness or any other thing. Jesus completes us (Colossians 2:10) and people complement us. Expecting one person on earth to do what Jesus came to do is dangerous and will lead to deep disappointments. Marriage is hard work and I know it doesn’t come with guarantees.
  • I’ve cultivated a dynamic relationship with God and expect Him to meet my needs.
  • I’ve become comfortable with who I am so I can be content alone. I accept what aren’t my favorite qualities that can’t be changed and I work on the others. I humbly celebrate successes.
  • I know the difference between being alone and being lonely and use the words carefully and accurately.
  • I don’t allow myself to isolate, but spend time with friends. I have several activities I enjoy and things I do to relax.
  • I’ve learned to ask for help because there are many things I can’t do by myself and other things I don’t know how to do. Asking doesn’t make me weak.
  • I enjoy the freedom I have to spend my money the way I want, eat what I want and where, decorate the way I want, make decisions in the way I think is best, …
  • I pamper myself. I cook good food and sometimes buy myself flowers. I own beautiful china and many other nice things. (I tell young people not to get married for the party and the gifts! Buy what you want.)

Does anything in my list help you think through your situation and contentment? Do you know singles you could share it with? Youth not dating who think they must?

There’s one more thing that’s significant to anyone’s contentment and life satisfaction. Obedience.

Whether single or married, the bottom line is obedience. Singles may not be single forever, but the key is contentment and acceptance for what the Lord has for each of us at any given time in our lives. We must make the most of every opportunity. (Ephesians 5:15‑17)

If I don’t believe my current situation is God’s best for me, what makes me think I’ll trust Him in my next phase? Living with a “grass is greener on the other side of the fence” thinking pattern dishonors God and isn’t appealing to me at all. Is it to you?

In this video, Dr. Kathy recommends some places that can be tech-free so conversations occur and relationships are strengthened. She also addresses a decision many parents make to only use technologyMonday-Friday for educational gain. Limits are wise. Watch this with your teens and talk about it. What can you do because people matter more than devices?

To learn more about Dr. Kathy’s book “Screens and Teens: Connecting with our kids in a wireless world” and the wide selection of resources provided by Celebrate Kids, please visit shop.celebratekids.com